A lenghthy blog!!-My swimming class with "J"

"When was the last time you did something for the first time"...a Great one liner,I take this kinda of catchy one-liners very seriously and by doing so I end up in some serious trouble most times.

Trouble came in form of my friend "J".This happened in July this year."J" called me up on a sleepy Saturday afternoon and said "Machan...I am planning to go to swimming class neeyum variya?". Most of my friends are like me, they need co-passengers :-) whenever they attempt a new thing. I said I am not that interested, J requested me to spare some time at least to accompany him to enquire about the class details next day.I obliged and that was my first mistake.

He arrived promptly next day morning in his car, we went to velacherry which is some 15 kms from our house. But for J distance doesnot matter, wanted only that swimming pool because according to him, its the best place for swimming in chennai. J is kind of of person who always wants best in everything[he got a shoe for Rs9000,when his monthly salary was just 4000 few years back,I guess you can understand his urge for"The best" things from this]

On our way to the pool,he slowly roped me in to the idea of swimming by giving lectures how swimmingis absolutely necessary incase of a Tsunami ,how swimming improves ones physique drastically which in turn make gals fall for you etc etc... He almost convinced me that the swimming is the most essential thing required next to food in this planet.

The swimming pool was awesome and J looked at me and I could see that he was implying "Did I not tell you this is the best pool man!!". We met the coach,he said the class had already begun 2 days back and the next batch is after a month.I was greatly relieved after hearing that, because at bottom of my heart I didn't want to learn swimming, but I put on a disappointing face for J's sake. But to my utter dismay and disbelief the coach dropped a bombshell the next minute "if you ppl wanna join now ,you can,as the class has just begun 2 days back and you can catch up be practicing harder". J pushed me aside and gave a pep talk "dei we need to do this da,only two days has gone,if we practice hard we could make it". I was confused and said " practica!! I don't know anything abt swimming da". Sensing what's going in mind J played it well "I also do not know ABC of swimming da, do not worry I feel we can make it". This pep talk and the one liner at the very top of this blog confused me and I nodded my head,that was my second mistake.

The coach hurriedly slipped in two swim wear to us and almost pushed us into the pool.It was large pool about 5 1/2 feet depth.There were around 10-15 ppl practicing and some of them seemed to look at us sympathetically for our brave decision of joining the third day of class directly.Most of the guys were practicing floating for 2 days now,coach gave a brief 5 min demo about "floating" to us.From the first look of it,I clearly understood that its goanna be very difficult for me to catch up 2 days class in 2 hours.But surprisingly J was composed and said "lets start" , we both started out floating together and next moment I drank half a liter of water and touched the floor of the pool and came up and was thinking that J would have had the same fate. But J,the B*****d had crossed half the pool by floating. In fact he was doing better than our 2 day old seniors in our batch. I was shocked becoz he had lied to me about his swimming skill earlier. Further the fear of going a to be lone back bencher in the swimming class for next 15 days was unimaginable to me . J came back with a smile and said "I don't know how, but I am able to float in the first attempt da". I really wanted to kick his ass, had it not beena public place i swear i would have done it.

That day started my swimming ordeal for the next 20 days,most tiring days of my life.I was in a drowsy state for rest of the day after swimming.Swimming, believe me, is one of the best cure for insomnia and I don't know why doctors are not recommending it.

Though with encouragement of J and my effort I was able to float next day, but found swimming definitely not my cup of tea. And more than swimming, the weariness after that, killed my productivity at work.I was eagerly waiting for the last day of the class.

I don't remember whether its 8th or 9th day of the class , coach took us all to a bigger pool 8-9 feet depth and started demonstarted us the diving. J as usual pepped me up with a one liner "Dei everybody has fear but ppl who don't show it out are called courageous person". I was coaxed again. Jumped in to the pool real flat and water banged on to my abdomen, Ouch....it really hurts!! . But it was fun for next few days except I felt more tired now and I was also very happy as the class is nearing is end.

Just a day before the last class , the incident happened. Coach had increased the distance we are going to swim for the day. Normally we would dive in and just two strokes we would reach the pool side.Today the distance was around 10 meters diagnoally across the pool.and the depth of the pool is 9 feet.It was tough and I requested J, who was standing before me in the queue to just have an eye on me till I reach the other end safely.For which he nodded his head reassuringly. My turn came and I delayed it for few mins to make sure J reaches the other end so that he could help me incase of any trouble. By that time I had lost faith in the coach , as he was more interested in coaching ladies and gals:-). So my only savior incase of any mishap is J.

I jumped instead of diving as usual, slowly came up and coach who was satisfied turned to the next person. I was slowly swimming towards the destination. And suddenly lost control and started drowning. Since we were swimming diagnolly across the pool, going back would not serve any purpose and the shore(?) of the pool was not nearby. I went down and gulped few liters of pool water and no one was noticing me.I totally forgot the lessons learnt on the 15 days and started to do shake my hands and legs in an haphazard manner. Finally after a lot of struggle, after filling my stomach with huge quantity of water and almost losing my consciousness. I reached the side of of the pool and came out crawling .To my utter shock no one had noticed my flirtations with with death not even J. After regaining my thoughts I was looking around for J, who was in a serious discussion about how his previous dive with a guy. I really wanted to push him down in to the pool and hold his head under water but was totally drained and shaken by my near death experience. Meanwhile J came to me and said "dei you did well da", which really made me to loose my cool and said "Yes I did well, that it almost killed me idiot". I told him that I am quitting the class . He started with his pep talks and his theory that no one can drown in 9 feet wateretc..etc..But for me "my something for the first time" ended just there. and strictly told him that I cant come to the class again. Though I got a certificate from the class, I did not get in to a swimming pool since then.J attended the next class alone and completed the course successfully.

I did not meet J after that day for 2 weeks.Out of the blue, he called me one Saturday and said "Macha,I am planning to learn Hindi,neeyum variya?".I paused for a moment and said "Yes..!!"...


Hummm........ somethings never change!!!

Adult Joke :-)

Writer Sujatha is one of my favourites in Tamil.His books are young,charming and crisp.I have read almost all his books. His famous characters are Ganesh & Vasanth.Ganes is one of the leading intelligent lawyer and vasanth his freaky, intelligent and playboy assistant.Both togather solve alot of mysteries related to crimes effortlessly.

Sujatha an electronics engineer by profession is one of the first author to write science fiction novels in Tamil.Recent book i read is "Malum oru kutram".Once again its one of his classic Ganesh-vasanth combo detective story .Following is a small anectode from the book.I really laughed aloud for this one.I have just repeated this in my words in tamil for obvious
reasons:-).



Vasanth :Boss romba tired irrukinga polliruku,nan oru joke sollatuma.

Ganesh :Onum vandam...

Vasanth :oru appavum payanum walking poiutu irrunthnaga, roadla rendu nayunga santhoshama irrunthuchunga... payan appava parthu "appa intha nayunga enna pannuthu pa" appadinu kataan...Appa first konjam tension annalum ....pinnadi smalichitaru...

Ganesh :Eppadi da?

Vasanth :Appa sonnaru...."onnul illa da ..oru nayuku odambu seri illa... athu nala inoru nai atha hospitalluku thalli kittu poguthu!!!

Self Centered Stupid Software Engineers

"Life is borin man!!" sipping his coffee at cafeteria, my colleague exclaimed.He continued "there are a lot of reports tight deadlines...and I am working almost 10-12 hours a day,its pathetic...Software job is "THE" worst job man..".

You could hear this in any IT company cafeterias across India.Though I really get agitated when people say that,I want to remain quiet.I shut my mouth and put on an expressionless face.

A brief peep into my career path will make you understand the reason behind my agitation.I graduated in 2001, an unlucky year for IT industry because, Y2k was over and the industry was unable to milk any more money from it,dot com boom which appeared to be the next Y2K was busting and to top it all WTC crash which almost crashed world economy.And I, like many ,was pretty much jobless for 10 months.Those were really difficult days and most IT guys had there tail in between their legs :-) as pink slipsand entrenchment were most common words spoken.

Then suddenly a new life line came thru for unfortunate fresher like myself,in the form of BPO.Those were very early days of call center.And pretty much any body applied were absorbed in.I worked has a support executive troubleshooting computers for American customers over phone for next 14 months.Then my luck break came after which I moved into software industry.So for me an IT job is a precious treasure which I got after a struggle and some one saying that job has pathetic is simply unacceptable to me period.

Lets come back to my software friends words "life is pathetic".When I hear that,I like to hit his head with an hammer so that I can wake him up from his self centered somberness.Come ...on...IT job is the best and envious job in this country.You work for a flexible timings[come any time -go any time],amazing work environment(Gyms,cafeteria,LCD TV's,team outings) above all, a fat pay and Onsite opportunities.

On the other hand lets look at a life of any other working professional in this country.Its different.When I was working in a call center,My day started around 11Pm in the night.I brushed my teeth and took bath at 11:30.My breakfast(?!!) was around 11:45Pm @ night.And our cab comes at 12 midnight.It slowly moves house to house andpicks up 5-6 ppl and reaches the work place by 12:45.And we talk,talk,talk for next 10 hours with just a break for one hour.During the 10 hours You face racial slurs,personal attacks from an unknown stranger for no fault of yours.If you are person with some pride in you,you will be bruised daily.Both ur manager and the customers will do stress testing on your patience and drag you towards your breaking point day in and day out.

Most IT people think that there will be a selected manual which has answers for all the customerproblems and the Tech support guy Has to just provide the answer from it.If you areone such idiot,please change ur idea...its not that simple...Here the problem could be as simple as task bar dislocation on windows to tough ones like helping a 80 year old Grandmother in replacing power supply over phone.And its not the technology that matters but dealing with people that matters.People ranging from children to old,drunkards,PhD holders,professors,illiterates,college drop outs etc..etc..One mistake from your part, you loose the other person's confidence and he could turn to a real pin in your ass.

In software industry,you will be allowed to do any number of mistakes,because your silly mistakes are between u and ur PC.The PC is never gonna hit back for your mistakesYou can correct it..retry..correct it again. But in a call center something doesn't happen as you said,during the tech support call,the other guy will loose confidence on you and he could turn to a sarcastic wolf or ticking human bomb waiting to explode...tearing your confidence and pride within next 15 mins.Each day is a war there and you win and loose on every call.Once the 10hours is over,you need to collect the bits and pieces of your inner self and drag urself to the cab.You will be dead tired both physicallyand mentally.Your customers will love you one day and they would take you to the roof and the next call you will be dumped and buried 10 feet deep.The fortunes changes every call and so does your joy and happiness.

Hence when an IT guy says that,his job is pathetic,I feel sorry for him because he fails to see the brighter side of his life.My advice to people both old and new to software industry is never scorn on ur job/work.Just start a look at the nice things u had becoz of the software job.Bring the images of ur parents beaming face when you give your sal to them monthly.Look at your bank statements,your cars,bikes,mobile phones...and above all your free time for reading stupid blogs like this :-) and ...You have a lot of good things happeningwhy do you sulk and focus on certain bad things...Enjoy your life to the fullest with all the comforts you got thru the job...Like any good thing, who knows this IT industry comforts could also end some day due to some down turn and you might end up without this pathetic job.

And one more note,when you meet some one who says they work in a call center.Do not lookat them condescendingly.just talk to them about their job,you will realize how demanding it is compared to that of yours.I could say this with confidence becoz I have worked in both.

"The Alchemist" - A must read book

Scene1:I was watching "Grand Master" in Vijay TV.(For ppl not seen it..humm... we could say its an interesting innovative program that's been shown in Vijay TV) First heard about Paul Coelho's Brazilian writer and also about his famous book The Alchemist in the program.The brief story line was described in the show in 2 lines as "Book about a boy who tries to find treasures which appeared in his dream". I was wondering this is like a child story and how could it be a best seller.

Scene2:I was just chatting with an online friend after couple of days of Scene1.She suggested me to read Paul Coelho's book and suggested Alchemist is very good one to start with.

Scene3:Interestingly and luckily for me ,my sis had the book in her collection and infact it was in my book rack for some time now but I did not notice the same until scene1 and scene2 happened.

I started the book at early morning 1:30 and completed the same in 3-4 hours.I can say with confidence,its one of the amazing book of fiction+philosophy, I have read in recenttimes.The story line is very simple,A Spaniard shepherd boy dreams about some treasures near pyramids of Egypt.He crosses the sea crosses the desert in search of it.The language usedby the book is amazingly simple but very powerful.The author appears to be "Master"and some of the words and lines bangs your heart and sticks to it.Each and every characterin the book stands out.No doubt that this book sold millions of copies across worldand considered as a "Modern Classic" by many.

Once done....I just checked with my friend and got couple ofbooks of Paul Coelho(The Valkyries and Zaheer).I am currently reading the former and it has already cemented my belief that the author is not an ordinary personbut could be a spritual'Master'..........I never imagined that a non-Indian could write such amazing spiritual,philosophy books.SO if you are an avid reader do not miss out Alchemist.

First Blog!!!

I am joining the blogging bandwagon atlast....

I never wanted to blog before as nothing significance was happening in my life.

My personal and work life was montonous and nothing worth mentioning

in blogs...

But now, I am riding in top gear,alot of changes in me...both physcially and mentally.

something tells me my life(work as wells as personal) is going to take a decisive turn either for

best or worst soon.Hence thought it would be nice to keep track of my path towards betterment

or my road towards insanity thru blogs.

I hope this blog provides you the fun it was intended.